"The Stars Lie"

The Stars Lie

After having actually lived in Hotels in downtown Minneapolis for over a year and a half, I have come to the conclusion that the star-rated ranking system designed for hotel accommodation is a flawed load of crap. 

I think it could have probably worked at one time. It seems the system used to be ranked on amenities; more stuff equates to more stars (or maybe more plush, more stars?) Certain amenities like a pool or a lobby bar would have added a star – amenities that families may look for.  Business professionals however, (or rock stars) could certainly care less.

I think that most high-end, inner-city boutique hotels can't (or choose not to) have pools, so it’s forced them to scrap the system and just wing it – or at least re-classify to the AAA system. Now, according to Priceline.com and Hotels.com they have all become four-star hotels. I’m curious if the folks that rate the hotels have even walked into these buildings to rank them personally? Who does rank them? Given the widespread misunderstanding in the industry about ratings and the fact that some have self-proclaimed themselves “7 star”, I’ll tell you who ranks them. No one! Like many systems we have, this one is broken. 

Downtown Minneapolis does have a healthy number of hotels but beware of the cookie-cutter, corporate hotel with a bunch of conventioneers - most of them sitting west of ninth and Nicollet Ave. I learned the hard way after staying at the Hyatt one particular time when a few thousand kids involved with a Christian convention, checked in only hours after I had. They were involved with something at the convention center, which of course is connected to the Hyatt via the skyway.  I swear, I wanted to jump out my 8th floor window. If you were seeking a romantic evening or weekend getaway I would not recommend hotels on that side of town.

My top three picks for quality and fun-factor in downtown Minneapolis start with the W Hotel, especially for party people. A Saturday night stay at the W with Manny's steak house below, Prohibition bar on the 27th floor, and the living room bar that turns into a packed night club late-night, you simply can't go wrong.

Looking for a little less hoopla? Hotel Minneapolis is one of the nicest and newest. But when checking in, ask for one of the L-Shaped, larger rooms. They have a few rooms that are a little tight, but over-all this is a top-notch experience.

My third pick would be the Westin with the beautiful Bank restaurant and bar in the lobby. Westin is close to Nicollet Mall with lots of bars and downtown shopping. It's a nice stay and truly a great location.

My least favorite hotel in Minneapolis is the Millennium.  Millennium hotels are known as top shelf hotels, and they usually are. But for some reason, the one here is sub-standard by far. I have so many problems with this hotel that I can't even begin; yet it has 3.5 star ranking.  In their defense, I have seen some remodeling going on around there lately.

Keep in mind when booking hotel rooms in US cities, stars warrant no merit. There are multiple systems around the world to rank hotels and all of them lack an understandable structure. Very few offer the intensive guest care that their ranking would suggest. Just because a hotel has amenities doesn't mean it's not a complete pile of shit.